Lauren Balik (@laurenbalik) unfollowed @WriteAheadLog on Oct 2, 2024

Ahhhhhhh Cliff Stoll wrote me an email and sent pictures of him holding a Klein bottle and his garden aaahhhhhh (this will appeal to cyber security folks of a certain age).

"As an AI language model, I can provide code snippets and explanations, but I can't directly modify or view your project files." But @v0 I'm asking you to write to @vercel project the chat is in. Do I really have to download all the files and re-upload them?

Dear Jamie Heller @JamieHeller, Editor-in-Chief of Business Insider, I would like to understand why your reporter Ana Altchek @altchekana made false claims about me that I did not respond to her requests to contact me. In reviewing my email, phone, and Signal records, I've

I actually like what the Morning Brew people do - it makes sense, it's entertaining. But the core BI stuff is awful, it's like a bunch of teenagers turning the HS newspaper into a gossip rag.

Business Insider is toilet paper. They wrote up an article about me and said I "did not immediately respond to a request for further comment" even though I never received comms. I will never forget this. Some spoiled brat lying about low yardage plays... https://t.co/hiuuTyVbvw

This guy. https://t.co/DCEYws6MOT

One of the biggest things in evaluating the Auto Parts space this past year was understanding the question: Who is running the storefronts? ❌Advance Auto Parts $AAP (which is getting crushed) tends to hire store managers with retail experience outside of the auto industry. vs. https://t.co/as4syYMsjT

Advance Auto Parts $AAP and Paul Graham had very bad Septembers. Two legacies no longer valid and gasping for air in this modern business landscape. https://t.co/a3RmgRB2q0

I enjoy Macy's GenZ business content - she's got an interesting style of presenting and covers a lot of ground digging into niche business stories.

It should be no big surprise that David Sacks has his own deputies running around San Francisco "mapping" things related to organized crime and human trafficking. If you want a good one: this Sacks crowd has been trying to mass distribute dashcams for mining crypto to https://t.co/0uIzAa10ug

Cava @cava $CAVA not one single NYC location of Cava was found compliant with any part of New York's Fair Workweek Law, and you paid out over ~$1000 on average to New York Cava employees, plus civil penalties. Skimming from your workers to inflate your stock price is pathetic. https://t.co/AIr7PB43lt

Tired: Haitian immigrants are eating dogs in Springfield, Ohio. Wired: Girls named Madison and Brittany are eating frogs at $CAVA. https://t.co/aaZCcCc3KD

Cava $CAVA is a disgusting mess of food safety and sanitation issues. We're in peak food poisoning season right now as well. October is when shiga-toxin e. coli cases historically peak with leafy green yields shifting at the end of Salinas/Central California growing season back

Man $COIN is so funny. 📉

Garry Tan. https://t.co/qjAoKOTK5O

A guy named Frying Pan could rout $COIN this week. Frying Pan decided to debut the science project he's doing at the Y Combinator Laundromat. Not only is it hysterical that Frying Pan just did a find+replace on someone else's code and used this to raise money, but Frying Pan https://t.co/GlVLv2CxHB

I'm not sure $LDI will be around 1-2 years from now, so that's where I'm focused.

Which round of MLB playoffs powered by Adobe $ADBE are people most excited about? -The T-Mobile $TMUS wild card round? -The Booking dot com $BKNG divisional round? -The loanDepot $LDI league championship series? -The CapitalOne $COF World Series? https://t.co/mvyr6HEwZn

RT @getzingdata: We're elated to be working with four of the UK's largest train operators ( @northernassist , @Se_Railway, @LNER , @TPExpre…

RT @getzingdata: One of the most frustrating things about data analysis is when you realize you need to join additional data sources or add…

I'm consistently perplexed by the origin story and # of employees of OnlyFans and what gets reported and distributed. OnlyFans current CEO Ami Gan has said there were over 1000 employees, with over 80% of them working on content moderation and support. This just doesn't tie off https://t.co/KSF05ajwxA

Joe Lonsdale of 8VC runs a wine pyramid scheme called OneHope Wine. Joe is the Exec Chairman of OneHope Wine and OneHope Wine's CEO is on 8VC's Board. I'm confident based on multiple conversations that OneHope Wine is a large buyer of Joe Lonsdale's tech interests. 🙃 https://t.co/23xPPkEUci

There are several layers to this. The main one is digitalizing prostitution (a paper cash business). The performers get paid out via OnlyFans then kick that up to the operators of these venues where they film from. They are prostitutes who have handlers/pimps and instead of

Question: do people not realize that OnlyFans is a gigantic money laundering operation? -There's no way to value streaming of adult videos. The sell side of the marketplace can set a high price and the buy side of the marketplace, if working with the sell side, can keep the https://t.co/TlWzYxp1OG

Boy I'd hate to be David Sacks @DavidSacks, lead investor in the Done Adderall pill mill. David Sacks' other drug-related lead investment - WAYV - ended up with CEO Keith McCarty rooming with a money launderer, crack, illegal possession of firearms, and hookers. https://t.co/dx3MRQf05r

Join me over on Bluesky: https://t.co/jn1qtnwYPf

RT @sjhmorris: Google and Meta struck a secret ads deal to target teenagers, covering their tracks internally with code words and euphemism…

I haven’t received an investor update on any of my angel investments in a year. Am I cooked?

Is it time for Snowflake $SNOW to (finally) acquire LiveRamp $RAMP? -Snow’s penetration into Global 2000 accounts is largely a fiction. Many of these accounts sit idle or only do “data sharing” via Snow. -LiveRamp is finally available at a good price. -LiveRamp is trusted

PROMPT: I'd like to learn more about Veradigm's $MDRX acquisition of Will Manidis' ScienceIO. -We know this acquisition occurred right in line with $MDRX's delisting from NASDAQ due to ongoing accounting issues and the failure to provide accurate financial reporting. https://t.co/OkuDKikk53

It's amazing how you, David Sacks, led a round in WAYV, where your former exec at Yammer Keith McCarty was in possession of crack cocaine and firearms, rooming with someone caught up in the Wirecard money laundering scandal. Your VC persona is a front. You are in the Mafia, https://t.co/b5JTKNgik3

Naval Ravikant running AngelList and then trading access to US companies and data for a Chinese cash injection is the #1 most obvious story in Silicon Valley. You have to ask yourself why Silicon Valley media hasn't covered this. Pathetic. https://t.co/HTPiLcpHN7

One of my top 10 follows, hands down.

Mike is a top follow btw - not saying he's "just learning this now" here, he's on point on many things.

https://t.co/dzoqopprbV

Many are only just now realizing the scope/scale of incremental startup equity collateralizing real estate investments and RE leasing office space to incremental startups. Now people can logically figure out why all these VC talking heads want people to RTO.

The next CCP-related money network to fall will be the Xiao Jianhua family network (Alpha Square Group, J17 Capital, WinnerMax real estate group w/ dozens of shell companies in Greater Toronto, etc.) I've been all over this for a long time. I'll have to write a book one day. https://t.co/U7lhviwPFn

Yes, Will Manidis has no idea what he's talking about re: Carta and Chinese money networks. He needs to be tagged, logged, and watched. (I've already had my sensors and feelers on him for a while with his Thiel-network connections.) 🇺🇸🦅

One great way to snuff out where dirty foreign money is getting filtered is to look at who is openly "defending the other side" when it comes to US defense and security. These people are not bright, even though they carry around papers that say they are smart. Keep eyes 👀 and https://t.co/2RsnaZj0sd

lol. lmao even. https://t.co/8t7eptW2VG

FT piece: https://t.co/76LHN14ag4

Great piece in the FT today on an FBI probe of Chinese-backed VC firm Hone Capital. M.O.: -Inject cash into AngelList (company that holds tons of cap table/investment information) -Obtain information/data rights from AngelList -Use this information to buy up equity via https://t.co/AX6YURdmLx

RT @TenreiroDaniel: the yaml file & its consequences have been a disaster for the human race

RT @NonGaap: $SNOW expects to concurrently repurchase $575M shares from "purchasers of the notes... in privately negotiated transactions"…

George Fraser of Fivetran finally blocked me. 😢 Every data/analytics person: go look at the absolute state of his absurd Streamlit (owned by $SNOW) app he's promoting. Look at it. Look at how silly this is. There is nothing, nothing, nothing of any value to any customer here, https://t.co/G38vNwQ2Bz

My email is lauren at uprightanalytics dot com.

I am very...bored?...unsettled?...listless?...in my life. I've run some small businesses and done fine. I know deep analytics very well and I know how to get deep on any company to find the "real" story, especially around tech. I would really love a mentor, whatever that means.

September Sillies: $SNOW, $RUM, and more fun https://t.co/olZacHivc5

at the end of the day these are similar stories. Ignore the politics of Rumble...it's just a case of raiding the balance sheet of a public company to provide liquidity for M&A of VC plays

Should we do a Snowflake $SNOW spaces? Maybe throw in some Joe Lonsdale/David Sacks BS as well around Rumble $RUM?

I've churned millions in ARR off George and Fivetran over the last 2 years. This Andreessen Horowitz game around Fivetran and dbt generated compute is a disgrace. https://t.co/BB3JIsAnzv

Snowflake $SNOW is the gift that keeps on giving. I want this on my gravestone. Lever up, baby. 📍

Rumble $RUM to Tumble: Why isn't Rumble Capturing More of the Candace Owens Trend on its Payments Platform Locals? $RUM is a great short of David Sacks @DavidSacks --- 1. I've been more than convinced for a long time that most of Rumble's view numbers are significantly https://t.co/tNULPqBrMZ

Yes, the US markets are no more sophisticated than those of most developing countries, even though we like to come up with reasons and "data science" why this fact is not true. The other scam around database/analytics companies is all the made up China revenue, which usually

Right on schedule, we're back to desalination plants from the Thiel money network. 👉I'd like to learn more about what Peter Thiel and Sarah Cone are up to with these two desalination companies specifically: Trident Desalination and Cetos Water. They have literally the same https://t.co/tce8b2n6Kl

Friendly reminder that you can start an LLC and sell your work above salary rates and deal with none of this circus.

Who is the doctor doing hair transplants for Joe Lonsdale, John Chambers, all the right-wing VC guys? It's too aggressive, too angled, and as the hair thins out anyway it looks ridiculous. I want a name of this doctor. Clear pattern. Looking into shorting a basket of names. https://t.co/RogZ3xRcDg

Weekly block list report: 3,568 entries; 3,547 valid / 21 invalid; 7 deleted #ads #adblocking #blocklist #trackers #pglblocklistreport List URL: https://t.co/IHAqyuVv10

Doh https://t.co/AIBOBjRzNx