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7 months agoAs I build up to the publication of my book Give Me Strength, I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting on my journey. I think the hardest part of recovery for me was that so much of my identity was wrapped up in being small.
I enjoyed the feeling of walking in to the gym or a room and people commenting on my body.
I loved being able to feel like a clothes hanger when I put clothes on and always being the smallest size.
I found so much validation in people telling me I looked amazing, that I didn’t really feel I brought anything else to the table.
What’s resulted from this is that I’ve had to work so hard to love me for me, regardless of the body I inhabit. I’ve been smaller and I’ve been bigger, and across my lifetime my body will expand and change in many ways I hope, and I need to be ok with knowing that regardless of this, I am a good person who deserves love from both myself and others.
It feels a lot easier to write the above than it does to put it in to practice, but I’m working my hardest to do the work and to get to a place of permanent acceptance and neutrality.
In my book, I detail the sometimes painful journey I went on with my body. It’s laid bare, in detail in a way I’ve never shared before. And I hope so many will relate to a lot of the things I went through and sadly projected on to others too.
I know that so many of you on here have been in smaller bodies, and still sometimes find themselves yearning for all that that body brought. It’s not an easy thing to walk away from so I guess this is just my way of saying I hear you, I empathise, and you are SO much more than your body I promise.
If you’re needing a helping hand in finding your peace, my book Give Me Strength publishes 4th July and you can pre order your copy now. I really hope it helps even one person on their journey 🤍